In the Steal of the Night

            Who knows what you'll find after you go through the window
            Perhaps a fine chardonnay or an old Nintendo
            You never know until you try with shaky hand
            What benefits you can earn plundering someone's land
            In their silent dark house you cannot turn on a light
            Unless you want to wake groggy persons for a fight
            Tiptoe is the preferred choice for seamless travel
            Bump into the fine china and you'll get the gavel
            You always first rummage through their fridge for a last meal
            Because it's up in the air where you go once you steal
            While you scarf down cold fried chicken and the last Fat Tire
            You look at their pristine dishwasher and admire
            It's a Kenmore SmartWash with Energy Star sticker
            Forget the rest, now you want nothing but to nick her
            So, you find the garage and gather all the right tools
            Walk back and realize you'd break many cardinal rules
            Never steal something you cannot fit into a sack
            And never steal something you're gonna wanna bring back
            In the living room one can find costly plugged-in stuff
            If you feel confident, you can carry on in the buff
            Avoid all the rooms except for the one with money
            Now, better leave soon or the cops won't think it's funny
            This is when one should leave a criminal calling card—
            pile of chicken bones on the carpet, not on the yard
            When you decide to leave, don't leave back through the window
            Unless all you took were chardonnay and Nintendo